Really Shouldn't Have Gone to Specsavers

Slightly off topic, but had to go to the opticians last week since I broke my glasses. So I book an appointment online at Specsavers, since their website claims you'll get your new glasses within a week.
So I turn up and report to the receptionist. She takes a few details from me and tells me to take a seat and wait for the optician. Someone then walks up to me and says they need to take me through a pre-sight test questionnaire. Questionnaire completed, I'm then taken over to someone else for my pre-sight test examination(!?). 20 minutes later, I see the optician. This last all of 5 minutes to tell me that yes, I need glasses. Useful. Since I currently wear frameless glasses, he recommended I stick with frameless glasses, with antiglare, scratch resistant coatings. No wonder, these are £50 more than designer glasses.
I'm then taken to the front of the shop to meet a stylist who helps me pick out my frames (I say frames, it is buy one get one free). She sole responsibility at the store is to hand you a frame, wait for you to put them one and say, "yeah, that looks good". She then invites me to take a seat and wait for the fitting specialist to see me. This person is trained to write order forms to the "factory" with my prescription and eye spacing. She then takes me to the payment desk, where someone else extracts silly amounts of money from me.

I then ask if I can by some contact lenses as well. "Oh, that's a different department upstairs". So I head upstairs and get told that the lenses they stock are different from the ones I wear, so I'll need a lens consultation. I'm reminded to be wearing my lenses when I come to my consultation.

So I return yesterday for my appointment, only to be told I didn't have one. I show them my card, and they check the system; deciding they can fit me in. I then get asked if I've worn lenses before. I decide to answer this by poking myself in the eye. So I see the consultant, who asks me if I've ever worn lenses before. I think there was some joke I was missing. So, by spending £20 on a consultation, I'm allowed to buy lenses. I then given some plastic bags, as "when I fly to Seattle I'll need to put my lenses in a clear plastic bag to get them past security." I declare I'll just put them in the hold, then spend 10 minutes explaining this concept to the receptionist.

I walk downstairs and find I'm able to pick up my glasses, thus completing my last ever trip to Specsavers!